dreams: April 1, 1999

I scream when the blue baby pops out

Someone is in labor. It's a woman friend of mine [that I only can't remember now, though her identity was clear in the dream]. I open a door and enter the room where she is in the process of having a baby. Other people are here too. I'm standing close to her, and I can see the baby's head start to emerge. Suddenly it pops out,: a tiny baby covered in a bright deep-blue goopy film (the consistency of a cat's placenta). It is the size of a doll. Its eyes open and look up at me, piercing and bright. I scream at the top of my lungs, I'm so startled and shooken up. A couple other people in the room also scream. I realize that we shouldn't be making so much noise since it could be scary for the baby. (This should be a labor in accordance with Frederick Leboyer's book on natural childbirths.)

Then I'm in a kitchen. Jude (from the D.) is stitching something for the baby -- a diaper or dishtowel or something. I have some moral objection to how the parenting is being done. I find myself in another part of the house, and I'm trying to protect the baby who is crawling around. The stepdad shouldn't be able to have contact, so I need to guard the baby.

I'm following a big group of teens. Many are wearing costumes. They're Phoebe's Ashland friends. Everyone is going to North Dakota for some special event.

putting my hand over Mom's heart

Mom says that we need to wait a few days because she has to do it (some family event) later in the week. We are sitting in John's house, and she's on a couch. She is exerting her controlling personae, with a harsh tone of voice and a sharp facial expression. I tell her that she is not the only one who gets to make the decisions and that it's worth hearing what other people (like John) want and need to do too. As I tell her this, I put my hand on her chest, in the center over her heart. She's wearing a white t-shirt with no bra and has very small flat breasts. I feel calm and strong, like her desperate need for power really doesn't have any validity here with us.

- FIN -

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