dreams: Monday, July 16, 2001
hot & horny in Lithia Park
I'm in Lithia Park, up high, almost to the top reservoir. I'm lying down on the ground near a parking lot. I'm turned on. I really want to masturbate. I wonder if it would be inappropriate to do it here. Other people might notice. I'm reading a zine. A group of young teens walk by me.
facing muck from the sea
I'm with John, and it's the day after a national holiday. We notice that the flags are at half-mast today. It's because of deaths that happened yesterday. Some big accidents.
We are next to the ocean. John talks me into getting into a little boat with him. The weather is stormy. The water is not clean. We make it to a shore on the other side of the body of water. There is a young man who seems foreign, as if he's a native of this new country we're now in. He helps us get to shore. I feel scared. We climb out onto a dock.
A creature crawls up onto the dock; it looks like a dog-sized black lobster, with lots of claws and tendrils. I'm grossed-out. It starts to come at us in attack, which freaks me. I don't want it to touch me (or John). It somehow grabs onto one of us, but we quickly throw it back in the water. I immediately bring in my Reiki guides for cleansing, drawing tons of Zee Ga Na symbols in the air with my hands, trying to get the creature's energy off of us.
There is a nearby shower as a safety measure -- to get the dangerous sea water's toxins off of human bodies. But the shower's water is also unhealthy, using a harsh alcohol cleaning agent.
We are now inside a building next to the dock. An old woman enters. She's some weirdo, with a little white dog on a leash. Her two other dogs follow her. They look a lot like the weird lobster creature from outside. They are little, dark and scroungy.
questioning my education
I'm at a dance institute that was founded by Swarthmore. I'm talking to the main leader/teacher. We're sitting at a small round table. I'm expressing my frustration and confusion about paying lots of money to go through four years of undergraduate education. Why did I do it? What was the purpose?
I go to visit Phoebe in college. Her class (everyone graduating in her year) is having a celebration. They are sitting outside on the lawn. As I approach, I see lots of my friends from Ashland High School. I realize it has been a long time since I've seen most of them. They are sitting and lying on blankets in the same area. I soccer game is going on nearby. I now have blonde hair. It is straight and reaches below my shoulders. I know that my eyebrows are dyed blonde too.
I sit down and say hello, hugging everyone at once. I see Melina Parrish, Jacob Bornstein, Holly Berman, Jordan Gans-Morse and others. Anna Winthrop is lying down on my left, and I'm happy to see her. I look around for Troy Henri. He's the one I care most about contacting. I don't see him here. I ask about him. They tell me he's decided to move to Maine. I realize he keeps changing his mind right before he graduates. He was in his last semester, but he stopped before the end, going to Maine to have to start his senior year over.
Then all of a sudden he appears, sitting down right next to me, on my right. He lies down. I'm so happy and relieved to see him. I hold his blonde head in my hands. He curls up next to me, resting his head in my lap. I'm wearing shorts, and my legs are bare. Without even speaking we know that there is a special old bond.
He gets up and moves a few yards away from the group, lying back down on the grass. He's wearing a white suit. He's holding something in his hands, looking at it as he lies down. I go over and join him. He opens his arms for me to lie down with him.
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