dreams: July 26, 1998

Mom is defenseless

I go to open my shower at Mom's house, expecting to see if I left anything there. I open the shower door and am suddenly shocked to see Mom standing there naked. The water is not running. She's freaked when she sees me, her whole body jerked with one strong jolt. I have the same sort of feeling; that one moment when we first see each other is like the feeling of almost hitting another car when you're driving or something -- a split-second of fear and adrenaline. She wasn't expecting to see me, and I wasn't expecting to see her.

[interp: All her defenses were down for that one moment. She was "naked" and vulnerable to me seeing who she really is, which provoked fear in both of us.]

a scary dive

NEXT, I'm watching two people get ready to dive into the ocean from a ship. I'm on the boat with them. The ocean feels fake and contained, like we're actually inside, or like we're at Disneyland. One of the divers is a woman who's showing how she'll have to curl up before she hits the water. She bends her knees into a sort of backwards fetal position. There is a lot of risk in the dive. It's scary.

my train

NEXT, I'm waiting for a train. I'm watching the horizon and the tracks for it to come around. Finally I see it, chugging along and blowing up puffs of steam from the front engine car. Then I'm riding the train, but it's now small enough for me to literally ride it (like a horse), straddling the top, sitting on a couple of the cars. The sea is on my right; I can see the beach far below me. The train feels good between my legs. I feel like I'm about to come.

- FIN -

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