dreams: August 5, 1998
my anger against Mom
I'm a young girl. Mom is doing something scary and manipulative to exercise her power over me and Phoebe. I am scared and angry. I want to get away from her. I tell her that I have support from others and that everyone knows that she shouldn't be a mother.
following a hippie chick around a city
NEXT, I'm at Swat. I'm standing outside the Willets dorm. It's night. I need to get inside to use a computer. The doors are locked, so I'm waiting around for someone who lives in this dorm to either come out or go in. Then a security guard comes along (the tall older guy with light hair) and lets me inside. I realize I'm going to have to borrow a computer in someone's room, since there aren't any public ones here. I find myself in a quad of women. There are cool posters on the walls. Three of the women are here. I'm sitting with them, talking. Two are blonde. They're frosh. The most talkative one has curly dark hair (jaw length); she's actually a sophomore or junior. I ask her why she's living in this dorm room. She starts to answer but ends up going off on a tangent, talking about her girlfriend. I smile. She's a lesbian, all-out. I like her. Now she's a hippie woman with long, straight, blonde hair. We are at an outdoor concert together. I look down the hill and see Cathy and David (Sierra, Britt and Melina's parents) sitting on a blanket on the lawn. Then Phoebe and John are with us. The woman is now showing us around a city where she lives. We're newcomers. I put a box of my stuff under a table on the sidewalk, hoping it's okay to leave it there. I keep thinking about moving into my dorm room. We walk by an open door to a food store, and I see a box of natural graham crackers on display; I'm excited thinking about the great foods that I'm going to stock my room with (all natural and healthy). Walking down the city blocks, I see many tables and stands selling fresh fruit and vegetables. There are long lines of people at every one, wanting to get fresh fruit juices and smoothies. Then John, Phoebe and I are talking about how he (John) is attracted to young women only. He says he's attracted to the hippie chick who was leading us around. He tells us that the first time he saw her, he was riding his bike down a city street, and when she saw him, she stopped and put her hands together (like she was praying) at her heart. John says he was moved by that, and it made him fall for her more than his "usual dancer women" who give him "lots of dolls." "They don't lavish dolls on you," Phoebe and I say at the exact same time. I look at her kind of shocked that we had such a bizarre jinx, both using the word "lavish" at the same time.
[I woke up in the middle of the night to turn off the fan. I knew I had been dreaming about God, though I couldn't remember how specifically. The concept of God has been turning up in my dreams repeatedly for the last few nights.]
- FIN -
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