I would have to put today down as one of my hardest ever. Getting very sick, again. Can't stop thinking about Mimi. But what I want to talk about is the response to my web page.
I have recieved two responses so far from people I don't know. The first was very positive. Someone wanting to share ideas, excited about what's going on. That I have only had a web page for about a week and already somebody is reaching out and saying hello, makes me very happy. So many people to learn from. But then I got an email with a not so encouraging sentiment.
I am not quite sure how to react. I want to say so much.
My intentions with this page are to try and use the internet to bring people closer together, to exchange information and to learn. I am still very new with all of this, and searching out my own way. I am trying out techniques of self expresssion, seeing what I feel comfortable with, testing myself. Perhaps what I am putting up now is not of great interest to the general public, but I am leaning a lot in the process. I am experimenting with this new medium. When I have been writing in my on-line journal, it has been to myself. I am slowly working my way outward though, trying to figure out how to best reach people. I have more info soon to come up that is more directly related to others, but I think that other people's experiences are not completely useless.
For me, this page is very much a work of art in progress.
Perhaps this person was not meaning to be negative at all. I am very nervous having a web page. The personal manner in which I have created it leaves me feeling very exposed. I have received such encouraging comments from my classmates that I was feeling semi-confident, but it is still hard to open yourself to the infinite possibilities of people's reactions. My ability to communicate through my writing leaves much to be desired, but I do not understand how people can give such negative feedback to nothing but good intentions. I am very scared right now. I have so many ideas that I want to explore on the internet, so much that I want to share and develope, but I also leave myself wide open for criticism. No more than usual perhaps, just a new format to get used to. But even this little journal entry has helped me realize that it's okay to keep on doing what I'm doing. Experimenting with my ideas, trying to create something to do some good for people. I welcome people's feedback good and bad, but I would love it if the critiques were in a constructive format that would help me understand your point. I have a long way to go on my page, and perhaps I should start with all the spelling and grammmar mistakes, but I feel like it is already headed to wonderful places. I have just made a few sketches on my canvas, gesture drawings, but I can see in them the spine of my work.