Lesson 1: Identification

The first objective of this course is to prevent any possible errors in actually recognizing Byron Holz on sight. The two photgraphs above have therefore been provided as aids. The careful student should realize immediately that the photo on the left is not a true picture of Byron and is in fact an enhancement of a recent infrared photo of the surface of Io taken using the Huble Space Telescope. The photo on the right is, of course, an actual image of our subject.

Lesson 2: Statistical Analysis

The low down facts and figures on that bearded chap who takes too many courses for his own health. The veracity of this information is guaranteed except when it isn't true. No animals were harmed in acquiring this data, though some were a bit shaken up afterwards.

• Name: Byron Richard Holz
• Known Aliases: Byr0, Byrno, Byrona, 'Rona, "Iron Bolts", Ed, Julian, Darwin, Faldor, Corporal Shultz
• Birthdate: Same as Lord George Gordon Byron
• Birthplace: Pittsburgh, PA
• Height: He'd like to think it's 5'10", but he hasn't checked for years.
• Weight: 165 before a Saturday Aikido class; 160 afterwards
• Hair: About the same color as this text in Netscape 1.1 or better.
• Eyes: Also brown, and unnaturally sensitive to bright lights
• Religion: Christian; member of the Salvation Army
• Occupation: Professional student, tutor, percussion teacher, research assistant
• School: Swarthmore College
• Major(s): Engineering and Music
• Instrument: Anything that can be struck (prefers 4-mallet marimba)
• Computer: A PC on a decidedly Mac campus ... *sigh*

• Skills: Being hurled to the ground over and over without seeming to mind (i.e. Aikdio), precision coughing, obtaining and eating meals from the dining hall at relativistic speeds, finding lost objects at the last possible moment, falling in love with people who soon end up in other states (geographic ones, that is)
• Hobbies: Finding a coincidence in almost anything, lots of games which require more thought than luck, a few games which require more luck that thought, great theologians (esp. CS Lewis & Kierkegaard), writing at very rare intervals, this web page
• Alergies: Cats, dust mites, tobacco, bad rock music
• Operations: Wisdom teeth removed - a simple dental procedure done w/ anesthesia; Spinal tap - a horrible procedure done w/ no anesthesia

• Weather: Blustery
• Time of Day: "The time between times" (dusk and dawn)
• Food: Homemade white chocolate/macadamia nut ice cream
• Colors: Grey (as opposed to gray)
• Theorems: The Holz Nonexistance-of-Coincidence Principle
  Close seconds: Godel's Undecidability Theorem, NEOOT
• Books: This list is perpetually incomplete.
  
  Fiction: (in no particular order)
  The Lord of the Rings
  The Hobbit
  Ender's Game / Speaker for the Dead
  The Pendragon Cycle
  Invisible Man (that's Ellison, not Wells)
  Canticle for Leibowitz
  The Narnia Cronicles
  The Neverending Story
  C.S. Lewis' Space Trilogy
  The [First] Cronicles of Thomas Covenant
  
  Non-Fiction:
  The Bible
  Surprised by Joy
  God in the Dock [Collection of Lewis' Essays]
  A Grief Observed
  The Journals of S. Kierkegaard
  Godel, Escher, Bach
  
• Movies: Again, no particular order...
  Shadowlands
  The Empire Strikes Back
  Star Wars
  Return of the Jedi
  [Those last three were in order]
  Star Trek II: The Wrath of Khan
  Lawrence of Arabia
  The Dark Crystal
  Schindler's List
  Henry V (KB - not LO)
  Much Ado About Nothing
  Blade Runner (esp. Scott's version)
  Alien & Aliens, but not Alien^3
  Tombstone
  
• Music: There is no answer to this, but the following breakdown has helped narrow it a bit:
  For Work/Study: Mahler & Beethoven Symphonies, Henry V soundtrack
  For Falling Asleep: Hush (Ma & McFerrin), Marimba When
  For Boggling the Mind: Anything by J.S. Bach
  For Boggling the Mind while Sleeping: Bach on the marimba.
  For a Cool Atmosphere: Pat Metheney (esp. First Circle & We Live Here), Joe Henderson (Lush Life)
  For Spiritual Musings: Perotin, Shadowlands soundtrack
  Hon. Mention: The King's Singers
  
• Fortune: (From a fortune cookie - fall '94)
  "Among the Lucky, you are the Chosen One."

There will surely be more info available on our subject as time goes on, but for now, as his dad would say: "Well... there it is then."

Back to BRH's home page.
A short personal bio which will no doubt leave some folks wondering.