my ankle.

may 04, 1999

i wrote this in my touchable journal tuesday night at the women's body image group, before we all got naked and ate chocolate...

my body becomes purely functional when i'm injured. everything is muscles, pain, lack of pain. i forget to look in mirrors, or when i do, marvel at the fact that i look mostly normal. in some ways, it's liberating -- i don't worry about what my body looks like -- i only think about how i can be using it.

at the same time, it's been interesting to notice people's reactions. being injured, being on crutches, makes me imperfect. at least that's the way i feel about it when i don't get the kind of looks i want to from people -- or when they avoid my eyes altogether.

being naked will be good, i think. a chance to reconnect with the other parts of my body -- a chance to reconnect with my body as a whole.