** five minute mistake **

i woke up this morning
my breath smelling like his
although it had been 2 nights before
i remember 
lying beneath him
smelling his breath
it was sweet
not awkward
somehow
i enjoyed it
that night 
when i made love to him
but it wasn't love
i didn't even know his last name
funny
how i long to be back there
just for one moment
to explain myself
"i'm not like this"
i'll say
and he'll just nod 
and turn over
and go back to sleep
not caring
because
he didn't know my last name
either

9/19/00 9:00 a.m.

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