CHAPTER EIGHT
-De gustibus non est disputandum;-that is, there is no
disputing against HOBBY-HORSES
; and, for my part, I
seldom do; nor could I with any sort of grace, had I been
an enemy to them at the bottom; for happening, at certain
intervals and changes of the Moon, to be both fiddler and
painter, according as the fly stings:-Be it known to you,
that I keep a couple of pads myself, upon which, in their
turns, (nor do I care who knows it) I frequently ride out and
take the air;-though sometimes, to my shame be it spoken,
I take somewhat longer journeys than what a wise man
would think altogether right.-But the truth is,-l am not a
wise man;-and besides am a mortal of so little consequence
in the world, it is not much matter what I do; so I seldom
fret or fume at all about it: Nor does it much disturb my
rest, when I see such great Lords and tall Personages as
hereafter follow;-such, for instance, as my Lord A, B, C, D,
E, F, G, H, I, K, L, M, N, 0, P, Q, and so on, all of a row,
mounted upon their several horses;-some with large stir-
rups, getting on in a more grave and sober pace; others
on the contrary, tucked up to their very chins, with whips
across their mouths, scouring and scampering it away like
so many little party-coloured devils astride a mortgage,-
and as if some of them were resolved to break their necks.
-So much the better-say I to myself;-for in case the
worst should happen, the world will make a shift to do
excellently well without them;-and for the rest why,
-God speed them-e'en let them ride on without opposi-
tion from me; for were their lordships unhorsed this very
night,-'tis ten to one but that many of them would be
worse mounted by one half before to-morrow morning.
Not one of these instances therefore can be said to break
in upon my rest.-But there is an instance, which I own
puts me off my guard, and that is, when I see one born for
great actions, and, what is still more for his honour, whose
nature ever inclines him to good ones;-when I behold such
a one, my Lord, like yourself, whose principles and conduct
are as generous and noble as his blood, and whom, for that
reason, a corrupt world cannot spare one moment;-when
I see such a one, my Lord, mounted, though it is but for a
minute beyond the time which my love to my country has
prescribed to him, and my zeal for his glory wishes,-then,
my Lord, I cease to be a philosopher, and in the first trans-
port of an honest impatience, I wish the HOBBY-HORSE ,
with all his fraternity, at the DeviL
My LORD,
I maintain this to be a dedication, notwithstanding its
singularity in the three great essentials of matter, form, and
place: I beg, therefore, you will accept it as such, and that
you will permit me to lay it, with the most respectful
humility, at your Lordship's feet,-when you are upon them,
-which you can be when you please;-and that is, my Lord,
whenever there is occasion for it, and I will add, to the best
purposes too. I have the honour to be,
My Lord,
Your Lordship's most obedient,
and most devoted,
and most humble servant,
TRISTRAM SHANDY.