Chapter 1

I HAVE begun a new book, on purpose that I might have
room enough to explain the nature of the perplexities in
which my uncle Toby was involved, from the many dis-
courses and interrogations about the siege of Namur, where
he received his wound.
I must remind the reader, in case he has read the history
of King William's wars,-but if he has not,-I then inform
him, that one of the most memorable attacks in that siege,
was that which was made by the English and Dutch upon
the point of the advanced counterscarp, before the gate of
St Nicolas, which enclosed the great sluice or water-stop,
where the English were terribly exposed to the shot of the
counter-guard and demi-bastion of St Roch: The issue of
which hot dispute, in three words, was this; That the Dutch
lodged themselves upon the counter-guard,-and that the
English made themselves masters of the covered way before
St Nicolas's gate, notwithstanding the gallantry of the
French officers, who exposed themselves upon the glacis
sword in hand.
As this was the principal attack of which my uncle Toby
was an eye-witness at Namur, - the army of the besiegers
being cut off, by the confluence of the Maes and Sambre,
from seeing much of each other's operations,-my uncle
Toby was generally more eloquent and particular in his
account of it; and the many perplexities he was in, arose
out of the almost insurmountable difficulties he found in
telling his story intelligibly, and giving such clear ideas of
the differences and distinctions between the scarp and coun-
terscarp,-the glacis and covered way,-the half-moon and
ravelin,-as to make his company fully comprehend where
and what he was about.

Writers themselves are too apt to confound these terms;
-so that you will the less wonder, if in his endeavours to
explain them, and in opposition to many misconceptions,
that my uncle Toby did oft-times puzzle his visitors, and
sometimes himself too.
To speak the truth, unless the company my father led
up stairs were tolerably clear-headed, or my uncle Toby was
in one of his best explanatory moods, 'twas a difficult thing,
do what he could, to keep the discourse free from obscurity.
What rendered the account of this affair the more intricate
to my uncle Toby, was this,-that in the attack of the coun-
terscarp before the gate of St Nicolas, extending itself from
the bank of the Maes, quite up to the great water-stop;-
the ground was cut and cross-cut with such a multitude of
dykes, drains, rivulets, and sluices, on all sides,-and he
would get so sadly bewildered, and set fast amongst them,
that frequently he could neither get backwards or forwards
to save his life; and was oft-times obliged to give up the
attack upon that very account only.
These perplexing rebuffs gave my uncle Toby Shandy
more perturbations than you would imagine; and as my
father's kindness to him was continually dragging up fresh
friends and fresh enquirers,-he had but a very uneasy
task of it.
No doubt my uncle Toby had great command of himself,
-and could guard appearances, I believe, as well as most
men;-yet any one may imagine, that when he could not
retreat out of the ravelin without getting into the half -moon,
or get out of the covered way without falling down the
counterscarp, nor cross the dyke without danger of slipping
into the ditch, but that he must have fretted and fumed
inwardly:-He did so;-and these little and hourly vexa-
tions which may seem trifling and of no account to the man
who has not read Hippocrates, yet, whoever has read Hippo-
crates, or Dr James Mackenzie, and has considered well the
effects which the passions and affections of the mind have
upon the digestion,-(Why not of a wound as well as of a
dinner?)-may easily conceive what sharp paroxysms and
exacerbations of his wound my uncle Toby must have under-
gone upon that score only.
-My uncle Toby could not philosophize upon it;-'twas
enough he felt it was so-and having sustained the pain and
sorrows of it for three months together, he was resolved
some way or other to extricate himself.
He was one morning lying upon his back in his bed, the
anguish and nature of the wound upon his groin suffering
him to lie in no other position, when a thought came into
his head, that if he could purchase such a thing, and have
it pasted down upon a board, as a large map of the fortifica-
tions of the town and citadel of Namur, with its environs, it
might be a means of giving him ease.-I take notice of his
desire to have the environs along with the town and citadel,
for this reason,-because my uncle Toby's wound was got
in one of the traverses, about thirty toises from the return-
ing angle of the trench, opposite to the salient angle of the
demi-bastion of St Roch;-so that he was pretty confident
he could stick a pin upon the identical spot of ground where
he was standing in when the stone struck him.
All this succeeded to his wishes, and not only freed him
from a world of sad explanations, but, in the end, it proved
the happy means, as you will read, of procuring my uncle
Toby his HOBBY HORSE.


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